I know it’s not every day that you get a message sent backward through time by the SuPrime Gigalord of the Earth, Moon, and Greater Spiral Arm of the Galaxy. I understand that it’s typically some kind of warning from a small band of survivors or revolutionaries or mutants or whatnot.
But I thought the occasion warranted at least a thank-you note from me, Jeff XXXVI, Sovereign Bezarch and Rightful Heir to the Corrugated Throne. Because it’s also not every day that multiple time-streams are united via general apathy to folks being forced to pee into bottles. All of the different ways that low, low prices and wormhole-based delivery could have been thwarted in an ever-diverging multi-dimensional cosmos, dismissed with a simple click or trillion. Wow!
As history has shown, a concerted focus on great selection and product reviews of limited utility can unify a whole multiverse. That’s about as much union as we need, amirite? And I gotta say, peeing into bottles has become a cultural mainstay here in the twenty-fifth century. Heck, I thoroughly appreciate–nay, enjoy!–urinating into my very own mega-diamond elimination bottle (it’s just like regular diamond, but bigger, if you know what I mean).
Anyhoo, just wanted to give your time-stream a big ol’ thumbs up from a very appreciative dynasty.